These are notes I jotted down WHILE listening to this excellent sermon on God’s word to children and to fathers. Unedited, not tidied up, as is: jotted notes. To find the sermon on "God's Word to children and fathers" - June 2010 - please click on this link. – by Greg Strain, St Albans, UK.
We hope you don't hear the notes in a harsh. shrill voice, and see the words in pictures of threatening and wagging fingers! We hope you hear a gentle, loving and authoratative (not a walk-over) voice.
Home is to be a place of unity and growth. |
Ephesians 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.You husbands...you wives..you slaves...and you children...
Obey, listen to your parents, do what they say. They obey-word means to listen (with attention) to what they say in the specifics and on how to live.
Submit in the Lord - your parents have been given a delegated authority by God. God does not give loads of detailed bits of guidance in your quiet time, He says a lot through those in authority over you.
| Parents are children's appointment authority. |
and what is the promise?
“so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.
God's promises have more to them than the bare promise - so there is no guarantee that you are not going to die young and have to deal with many difficulties. The principle here is that you will enjoy spiritual blessing.
Authority is counter-cultural. Authority is not a way to enslave but it's the way to freedom. There is an anti-authority streak in our present culture in parenthood. Parents know how difficult life will be if you don't know how to handle money, they know laziness is destructive, etc. etc..
| A WORD TO THE FATHERS: nourish and cherish. |
Ephesians 6:4 Fathers do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.Fathers do not make you children angry, don't frustrate them.
Ask your children what frustrates them in your home (without being manipulated by them!! - principle- example you make me brush my teeth every day!")
Here are some areas that frustrate children and make them angry:
- Lack of marital harmony.
- N o clear boundaries.
- Angry parents
- Unfair scolding
- Legalistic - loads and loads of rules - who knows why!
- Parent not admitting when he's wrong
- Constantly finding fault
- Listen to their side of the story
- Time to talk to your children
- Not keeping promises
- Too much freedom. Not enough freedom.
- Unrealistic and crushing expectations
- Favouritism - makes kids mad
- When children are angry and furious it is difficult for them to listen
Positively..instead. Ephesians 6 "instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."
Instruction, admonition, correction, gentle rebuke - all part of the package.
Here is the nourish word: bring them up - bring them to maturity, to know Christ and what it means to live for Him.
| WHAT DO YOU AIM FOR IN CHRISTIAN FATHERHOOD? |
Picture you child as a teenager and adult - who understands grace
- who knows how to live the Bible
- knows how to care
- who relates well
- who has a heart for the lost
- who knows what kind of spouse to look for
- who grows in the fruit of the Holy Spirit
- who knows how to pray and how to battle sin
- Christian dads are to be trainers with the Bible as the manual - teach at home and make sure they are taught.
- Raise them in the knowledge of the Lord - even if they don't get it all.
- Let them know that you love them and they can be open with you.
- Your kids are watching you - let them learn from you how to trust a sovereign God. What do they see when they see their dad in crisis, or in easy times, etc.?
Our own families are to be places of grace - we need to say sorry to our children and our children must be prepared to say sorry to the parents. None of us do anything perfectly.
