My friend, Ali, lent me "A Grace Disguised" by Jerry Sittser. The reason why it's taking me ages to read, is that his book is so deep and true that I'm tempted to jot down all his thoughts in my notebook. So it was that I sat on the Chapel step, waiting for another friend, once again reading and making notes. Today the theme is "forgiveness". Wow these are the best writings I've ever encountered on this ever-necessary topic. The author is not merely theorising. He has experienced horrendous trauma and has much to forgive. Here are a very few selected lines:
- Am I going to obsess with the wrong done to me and drive mercy from my heart?
- Forgiveness is giving up the right to get even - this is costly and it’s not a right that is easy to relinquish.
- It is not easy to forgive when my human sensibilities yell "punish! ", "get even!", "I hope you suffer!"
- A desire for justice is right and human.
- It is possible to both forgive and strive for justice.
- However difficult, forgiveness in the end brings freedom to the one who gives it.
- Am I content for God to punish the wrongdoers and let Him show mercy as He chooses to?
- God will judge every person with fairness, full knowledge and impartiality. Learn to forgive, let God be God and be happy.
- It is not up to me to even all scores, punish all wrongs
- The unforgiving person is tormented by a recording and replaying that never stop. Forgiveness require that I stop the replay. I need to get to the point where I don’t forget but neither do I obsess.
- Forgiveness is a process, rather than an event. I may have to forgive many times more.
- Forgiveness has a beginning.
- People who really forgive are people who hope that the offenders will know God’s mercy.
- Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. It is impossible to forget enormous trauma and it’s unhealthy to forget. But those who forgive, do not live with poisonous memories that imprison them.
- Am I going to be imprisoned by my hatred or am I going to be a recipient of God’s love and grace and healing?
- The starting point of forgiveness, is to recognise the wrong that was done.
- Forgiveness has its limits. It does not make life perfect, nor absolve the offender of guilt, nor erase the consequences, nor reverse the wrong.
- Forgiveness can change the consequences in the relationship between offender and offended.
